I guess by now all my blog readers, Facebook friends and acquaintances, twitter and tumbler followers know that I am no stranger to insults and name calling. Specially after my last blog post about the “Walk of Shame”, the photo shoot of which certain acquaintances of mine did not find appropriate and which led some insults flow in my inbox.
I wear peculiar clothes because I want to , I rip them off because I want to. I bought them, so I will do what I feel like with them, but you know what... I kinda like a little drama. It keeps my life interesting and gives me topics to talk about when I get together with my friends and family and blog about. Trust me.... my mom is the biggest fan of my blogs, even though she can’t really understand my psychology ... (aww poor thing..lol). I’m so sure she sometimes must be wondering why did she have to get a son like me. Lol
I usually do not wear tattered clothes and look like a hobo but sometimes it’s just fun to wear it and go out. Make a little difference in a city where people are scared to express themselves , where everyone wants to be on the safe side, head in the same direction as the world and wear the same old crap like the rest. Why?
I believe in fashion and will continue doing it... right now I do not have money to go all DOLCE &GABANNA on myself but when I do, I sure will with all the pride but till then..... Digging in my closet and reinventing my own clothes are the only options I have.
In this blog I would like to share some come backs which I generally use while facing insults. Some are invented by me, some by my friends and some I just read on the internet.
Like I said ever since I was a little boy I was accused of being fat and ugly.... the bullying did not stop for a very long time.
Growing up I could not deal with it and lot of ideas ran in my head but there came a point of time in my life when I said to myself“ You know what... enough already”. YOU BITE ME AND I WILL BITE YOU BACK.
So here is the list of comebacks that I generally use. Hope this will help you. This includes comebacks for gays, straight, fat, ugly and more.
- YOU FAG- Yes please. Do you have a lighter?
- Bitch you are like Monday....nobody likes you.
- YOU FAGGOT- Yeah and now that you know, do you wanna give deep throat?
- YOU ARE FAT: I maybe fat but you are ugly. I can lose weight you see!!
- I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't really shove my head that far up my arse!
- If fat people call you gay- You see I don't really talk FUGLY (which means fat and ugly). So please forgive me for that.
- Did your parents tell you that you are a result of no condom supply.
- Can you stop talking because your breath honks like a skunks arse.
- DUDE YOU ARE SO GAY: Oh so tell me what ticked you off? "My amazing style, wit or just the fact that you can;t beat my fabulosity?
- So you're a belly dancer? But I thought belly dancers are suppose to move their belly not flab?
- If you need a good comeback then go feed on a dick coz you aint getting any close to me.
- ARE YOU GAY? : Oh dude (sad smile). How long has it been since you last got laid?
- Yeah I am such a fag that my middle finger gets a boner when I look at you.
- I got five fingers and the middle one is for you.
- Please stop smiling, you got yellow teeth and it's gross.
And the best insult/ comeback that I have ever heard comes from NIKHIL SRIDHAR who says-
You low corrosive lump of faecal horror! You maniac bastardy turd! I would rather drink stale urine from Norman Fowler’s arse pit than remain one moment more in your defiling company. You’re filth! You’re crack! You’re the ooze of a burst boil! I abominate you! You towering mound of corrupted slime! You're every utterance is like the slithering hiss of a fat maggot in the putrid guts of a decomposing rat. Your face is fouler than the un-wiped inner ring of Satan’s rectum.